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Coaches as bands

You know, the whole “Coaches as…” meme may be so 2008. PWD did Coaches as South Park Characters. Garnet and Black attack did Coaches as figures from Romantic Lititure and Philosophy.   Even The Capstone Report did Coaches as CEO’s.

Wait those last two were this year.

So, I was listening to John Tesh the other day and realized OH MY GOD, WHAT AM I DOING IN A DEPARTMENT STORE!  Luckily, Ms. Bulldog in Exile assured me that I was there with her and that we were soon to leave for wing night at BW3’s, so a crisis was averted.

While listening to Tesh, doing all of Yanni’s greatest hits, it struck me that there is a correlation between musical artists and SEC coaches.

Nick Saban=David Lee Roth:  Both are widely revered and vilified.  Both have plenty of ability.  Both have been number one.  Both have failed miserably.  Both are egoistical dbags.  Bonus: There is a ‘Just a Gigilo’ joke here somewhere.

Bobby Petrino=George Michael: Both are living off of success they had some time ago.  Both have had to sneak out of town under suspicious circumstances. However, there is no word on Petrino’s interest in public bathrooms.

Gene Chizik=William Hung:  What?!?  I mean, what?!?

Urban Meyer=Toby Keith:  You either love them or hate them.  You cannot deny their talent.  You cannot deny they are jackasses (even though personally, I like one of them).  Both are possessed of a love it or leave it mentality.

Mark Richt=Vince Gill:  Great coach/musician.  Good men.  Both have bad streaks that they only let out when they need to.

Rich Brooks=Tony Bennett:  Both had success a long time ago in another place and time.  Both have had a resurgence in a place that no one would have thought they could have.

Les Miles=Willie Nelson: Incredibly successful, no matter how hard they try to piss it all away.

Houston Nutt=Ozzy Osborne:  Of all the things they have lost, they’ll miss their mind the most.

Dan Mullen=Dave Groll:  The both got breaks because of the guy they worked with. Both were a big reason for the success of their former ‘mentors.’  It remains to be seen if Dan Mullen can pull off what Dave Grohl did and actually produce a better product than his mentor did.  At least Urban Meyer can handle success.

Steve Spurrier=Rolling Stones:  Once relevant and the Kings of their genres.  Now, relegated to everything they have feared they would become.  Yeah, Keith Richards and Steve Spurrier are good for a few quotes, but at the end of the day, who honestly is going to pay $45 to see either of their shows?  Only the die hard fans.

The Kiffer=Jonas Brothers: They are so cute and have so little substance.

Bobby Johnson=Presidents of the United States of America: Both have done an awful lot with very little talent.

*This post can be seen here as well at the new blog.  Please remember to update your book marks.


From the cornfield

Each week, I try to bring some idea to give folks at home an idea of the challenges and rewards of being a Bulldog in Exile.  I’ve written about BBQ, football, other sports, my travels, and whatever generally strikes me midweek.  A few weeks back, I wrote a guest column for my home county’s newspaper, The Blackshear Times.  It was a general retrospective, but after hearing from people that live here, who happened to read it, I decided to put it in the blog.

In it’s entirety, with thanks to Robert Williams:

Where are you from?

Where are you from?

Think about that question: Where are you from?

For the 20-plus years since I last lived full-time in the Otter Creek community, I have always answered “Pierce County,” usually having to add “Georgia” after getting puzzled looks.  It usually isn’t the last time I get funny looks from people if they are around me longer than four minutes; my personality usually ensures that.

People’s personalities are a sum of their experiences.  While I have had the opportunity to travel much as well as live in three very different places since I last lived in Otter Creek, the most lasting memories and impactful experiences are still those from Pierce County.  In essence, I am an amalgam of the people and events of Pierce County from the last quarter of the twentieth century. That is something I am very proud of and something everyone else who is from here can be proud of.

It’s been 23 years since I pulled out of the parking lot of the Oak Plaza, where I had breakfast with my mom the morning I left for Athens and college.  To this day, I remember the thoughts and feelings I had about leaving.  I also took great comfort in knowing the place I call home had prepared me for the few successes and many failures I would encounter along the way.   So much of what I am today has its roots in things and people from Pierce County from before and after I left home.

I like to tell people I am an ambassador of all things Southern in the Midwest, where I currently reside.  In fact, I am really an ambassador of all things Pierce County.

I believe BBQ is a noun, not a verb.  BBQ is pork and nothing else, and it should be served with mustardy sauce on the side, so folks can put as much or as little as they like on it.  I believe Friday should be exclusively reserved for high school football.  Saturday is for Georgia football (if you like Tech, I guess that is acceptable if you went to college there).  Weekly papers should come out on Tuesday or Wednesday.  At least one restaurant in town, no matter the size of your town, should have a lunch buffet with fried chicken.  Prom should be held at your high school, and the juniors should be responsible for decorating.  If you have a real party, you either have it at the river or the golf course.  Fishing should be done in a river to count as sport.  Peanuts are boiled and never with anything but salt.

On a broader scale, we are ambassadors of our experiences here.  We are the product of tobacco picking, stacking hay, football camp, band practice, forestry competition in Broadhurst, three-hour bus rides to “away” games, cruising from Hardees to the old high school and back, newspaper sales drives to win a bicycle, the swimming hole, Fernandina, Sunday afternoon movies, Vacation Bible School, picking peppers, car washes, livestock judging, swimming on Thursday night in Patterson, one act plays, Forest/Pecan/Fall Festival, friends dying from cancer and car wrecks and other senseless things, the Big Z market, July 4th in Patterson, first kisses in Wall’s parking lot, scouting cotton, school consolidation, the Timber Bowl, golf, walking to the rec department to play pickup games and countless other things.
However, my story isn’t unique.  There are literally thousands of us that no longer live in Pierce County and still proudly call it home.  That in itself is a remarkable testament.

Even if people ask where I live after hearing my accent, I will ask if they mean ‘where am I from?’

I am always proud to say “Pierce County,” even if it gets me funny looks.


An old man’s game

For 71 holes, Tom Watson gave us a thrill.  Make that 71 1/2 2/5 holes.  He was the master.  I truly believe had he and Eldrick been in the final pairing, nothing different would have happened during that 71 2/5 holes.  The New Old Tom Watson was the master at his craft once again.  I would even think Watson doesn’t short arm that putt and if the Open Championship is on the line against the guy he is paired with, Watson sinks it.  If you don’t believe me, ask Jack Nicklaus.

I had a great spoof written about Tiger being interviewed and saying obviously the Open Championship had been set up for the old men, noting Watson, Cink and Westwood’s successes. I had a great line about Woods being told Cink and Westwood were only 3 years older than him, and Tiger saying something about them ‘dressing older’ and asking if they were sponsored ‘by Stride Rite or something.’   I just couldn’t make it work after Watson fell apart in the playoff.

I don’t hate Cink.  I think he played great golf for all 76 holes.  Age didn’t finally catch up with Tom, he just did something that every player that has ever walked on the course has done.  Cink didn’t take anything from Tom Watson.  Tom Watson left it out on the 18th hole when he short armed an 8 foot putt.  Cink didn’t short arm that same putt 30 minutes before Watson played his.  That is all and that is all.

Congratulations to Stewart Cink, even if he is a Techie.  Thank you Tom Watson…just thank you.


I guess the Open Championship is over

I look for NBC ABC/ESPN to only do updates and no live coverage, since Tiger missed the cut.

At least Tom Watson is hanging around. Plus, John Daly is only five off the lead, so we stand a good shot of seeing a cig and some plaid during those lookins this weekend.


So, I see who has won the Hartman award

Frank Ros is in great company.

1992 Billy Payne
1992 Fran Tarkenton
1993 Gov. Carl Sanders
1993 Tom Cousins
1994 Dan Magill
1995 Billy Henderson
1996 Lt. Gov. Pierre Howard
1997 Jimmy Gabrielsen
1998 Dr. Andy Roddenbery
1999 Hilton Young, Jr.
2000 Dr. Becky Birchmore Campen
2001 Dr. Tommy Lawhorne
2002 Dr. Tommy Lyons
2003 Dr. Robert E. Dicks, III
2004 William Young
2005 Judge Aaron Cohn
2006 Keith McSwain
2007 Mack Guest, III

Yeah, he deserves to be in this company.  I wonder if Dr. Dicks nickname is inscribed on the award?


I mean, who has won it for the last five years

Frank Ros is awarded the Bill Hartman award, given to a former varsity letter winner who has received their baccalaureate degree from Georgia.  The requirements are at least 20 years since graduation and excellence in their chosen field, as well as exemplary community service.  Ros, captain of the 1980 national championship team is the assistant vice president of Latin affairs for that little beverage company in Atlanta.

Yeah, I think that’s right.  Congrats, number 48, you are a DGD.


Kupets wins the Honda-Broderick Cup

Courtney Kupets, Georgia’s all everything gymnast, became the first Georgia athlete to win the award for female athlete of the year, the Honda-Broderick Cup.  Considering the award is 33 years old and the powerhouse gymnastic and basketball teams UGA has had, that is pretty surprising.  Considering who she beat out is even more surprising:

  • Renee Montgomery, UConn.  Montgomery, a four year starter in basketball at UConn, was the captain of the undefeated national champions.
  • Sally Kipyego, Texas Tech.  Kipyego is a third time nominee from cross country.  She is a 10 time All-American with 8 NCAA championships in her career.
  • Susie Rowe, Maryland.  Rowe lead the Terrapins to their sixth national championship in field hockey, the third in her four years.  She scored 28 goals and 74 points on the season, both school records.  She was named MVP of the ACC tourney and defensive player of the year in the field hockey crazy ACC.
  • Maria Hernandez, Purdue.  Hernandez won the women’s golf individual title this season and was a three year All-American.
  • Hannah Nielsen, Northwestern University.  Neilsen led the Wildcats to their fifth consecutive lacrosse title.  She led the nation with 142 points and 83 assists, breaking her own assist record of 69, set in 2007.
  • Casey Nogueira, University of North Carolina.  Nogueira led the nation in scoring with 58 points and 25 goals, seven of them game winners.  She scored both goals for the Tar Heels in the NCAA championship match, leading them to an upset over previously unbeaten Notre Dame.
  • Danielle Lawrie, University of Washington.  Yeah, we know her.  National Championship in softball, plus she led the nation in strikeouts (521) and wins (42), was third in shutouts (21) and sixth in ERA (0.97).
  • Dana Vollmer, University of California.  2009 swimmer of the year and national championships in the 100- and 200-freestyle, as well as leading the Bears to their first team championship.
  • Mallory Cecil, Duke.  She won the individual tennis title as a freshman, the first woman to do so.
  • Jennifer Barringer, Colorado.  She broke the NCAA indoor mile record by 3 seconds, recording the fastest women’s indoor time of the year in the world.
  • Nicole Fawcett, Penn State. Led the Nittany Lions to their second consecutive national championship in volleyball, winning every set they played in the regular season and only dropping two sets all season (both to Nebraska in their national semifinal 3-2 win).

She is the second gymnast to win the award.  It is selected by vote of nearly 1000 NCAA schools and the board of directors for the Collegiate Women Sports Awards program.

    Congratulations Courtney, you are a DGD.

    Go Dawgs!

A Georgia Dawg in the Mid-West alone with his thoughts.

BBQ, Ball and Bets

There's nothing like a sunny fall afternoon, pork BBQ (with mustard sauce, of course!), a pregame tailgate, and...betting online. You heard me right. With a laptop and an internet connection you can check the odds of any game from the 50 yard line. Now that's convenience and will make your tailgate all the more interesting when some dude mentions just how much of a good bet a certain game is.
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